| About Jen Ward |
Jennifer Ann Ward was born on March 28th, 1975 and grew up in Little Falls, NJ.
She moved to the South Jersey shore before beginning her freshman year at
Ocean City High School in 1989. After graduating from Ocean City, she spent a
year at The College of New Jersey before moving to Baltimore and earning her
degree from Loyola University. After graduation, Jen lived in Conshohocken and
Blue Bell while moving up the corporate ladder. She soon realized, however, that
her heart was not into the money of human resources, but in the greater rewards
that come with making a difference in a child's life.
So in the summer of 2002, Jen gave up her job at JDS and moved home to Seaville
to prepare for her first year as a math and computer teacher at St. Ann's Catholic
School in Wildwood, NJ. Jennifer was a born teacher, someone who always put the
success of her students first. She loved what she did and loved her students and
cheerleaders. She also loved spending time with her family and friends, shopping
with Mom, heading out for a night in Somers Point or Sea Isle, catching some sun
on the beach or back deck, rooting for the Yankees (often very vocally!) and
enjoying the sunset with a glass of wine at the Anchorage Poynte tiki bar. These are
but a few of the joys Jen took out of life, but the love and joy she brought into the
lives of those around her was tenfold. She was truly one in a million.
She moved to the South Jersey shore before beginning her freshman year at
Ocean City High School in 1989. After graduating from Ocean City, she spent a
year at The College of New Jersey before moving to Baltimore and earning her
degree from Loyola University. After graduation, Jen lived in Conshohocken and
Blue Bell while moving up the corporate ladder. She soon realized, however, that
her heart was not into the money of human resources, but in the greater rewards
that come with making a difference in a child's life.
So in the summer of 2002, Jen gave up her job at JDS and moved home to Seaville
to prepare for her first year as a math and computer teacher at St. Ann's Catholic
School in Wildwood, NJ. Jennifer was a born teacher, someone who always put the
success of her students first. She loved what she did and loved her students and
cheerleaders. She also loved spending time with her family and friends, shopping
with Mom, heading out for a night in Somers Point or Sea Isle, catching some sun
on the beach or back deck, rooting for the Yankees (often very vocally!) and
enjoying the sunset with a glass of wine at the Anchorage Poynte tiki bar. These are
but a few of the joys Jen took out of life, but the love and joy she brought into the
lives of those around her was tenfold. She was truly one in a million.
| Jen and Gerry |
When I sat down to write about my Jennifer, I knew I could write a book about all the
wonderful memories we shared. The first pages of my book would be filled with the love
we shared from the moment I laid eyes on her. On March 28th, 1975, I gave birth to the
most beautiful baby in the world. From that day on, I knew that Jennifer and I would begin
a relationship that I would cherish forever. She followed me around the house as if she
were part of my shadow, always looking up at me with those beautiful big brown eyes and
melting my heart. As Jennifer grew up we continued to grow closer and closer both as
mother and daughter as well as best friends. We could look into each other's eyes and
know what the other one was thinking.
I constantly observed a selfless caring person. She always expected perfection from
herself but never demanded it of others. She looked at me as her Hero and I saw her as
my Hero. Many times when we would switch roles and she would become the mother and I
the child, she would comfort me and try to reassure me that everything was going to be
fine. She always knew when I was upset about something. We could always confide in
each other and share our inner most thoughts. We had a respect for each other's
opinions, views and always considered each other's feelings. I always loved to see her get
excited about funny things. There were times when she would laugh so hard that she
would put her hand to her mouth and chuckle so heartily that her eyes would tear up.
Many pages of my book would be filled with the fun and laughter we shared. We would
shop all day, since anyone that knows Jen knows how much she loved to shop. She
taught me about style and fashion, how to do a French Manicure and straighten my hair.
We would watch TV together, and nobody was better at Friends Trivia than Jen, since
that was one of her favorite shows. We also loved trying to figure out the plot on our
favorite soap opera. Sometimes on Sunday afternoons you could catch Jen and I on the
couch watching a good movie.
Some of my pages would be splattered with sauce, since one of Jen's favorite things was
to cook Italian food. She became very confident in her cooking, and even taught me how
to make few dishes, such as enchiladas and stromboli. Jen had become a very
adventurous cook, always trying out new recipes that she had found. She also helped to
decorate our house by helping to pick out just the right furniture and pictures that would
go with our "Island/Nautical Theme" that helped to make our house so special.
Jen put passion into everything she did. She always had such an inner strength. She
never gave up and worked very hard to accomplish anything she set her mind to. When
she entered a room, she always had style and walked with such grace that she turned
heads and lit up the room. She always looked at life as a beautiful gift no matter what
trials she faced. She used to say to me "I choose my fights and battles and when it's just
not important you have to let it go."
You would find some of the pages filled with Yankee baseball memorabilia, since Jen was
an avid fan and loved to discuss and watch Yankees games with her Dad. At first she
would tell her Dad to stop screaming out loud at Yankee Stadium or at the TV, but then as
she became the True Blue Yankee Fan, she could scream and yell for her team as loud
as anyone else.
Some of my favorite pages would be filled with pictures of her many students at St. Ann's
Regional School in Wildwood. Jen loved teaching and I think she had a true gift. She
shared with me her philosophy on teaching one day. She said she believes each child is a
special child and she felt blessed and honored to be a part of it. She always taught with
the motto "To strive to make a difference in the students lives and to empower them to
live up to their potential that she knew each and every one of them possessed." She
shared with me her favorite phrase about teaching from Forrest Witcraft:
"One hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of
house I lived in or the kind of car I drove, but the world may be different because I was
important in the life of a child."
Jen use to say that someday she wanted to have children and shared with me in a card "I
hope someday when I have children I can teach them everything you taught me.
Then suddenly a mother's worst nightmare happened - on January 7th my Jennifer was
taken away from me. The next several pages would be filled with tears, confusion, anger
and frustration, as I try desperately to somehow accept that my baby Jennifer is gone.
Family and friends immediately came to surround us and support us. Our house was filled
with people, food, flowers and cards, and all I could do was sit and cry on the couch
during this horrible nightmare. Now weeks, even months have passed and I still sit and
talk with those same family and friends who shared words of wisdom and comforted me. I
look at the many beautiful cards we received, and walk around our house looking at the
many beautiful pictures of my Jennifer, and I still feel the pain and the loss of my beautiful
girl. Everyone tells me it will get easier with time... well, I'm still waiting for it to get easier.
Although this has been all about my beautiful Jennifer, I have been blessed with another
beautiful daughter, Michelle. She has been my strength through this and I am so grateful
that she is patient with me, and I look forward to the many memories we will continue to
share together.
Jennifer touched so many hearts and lives in her short time with us. We cannot thank
everyone enough for all the outpouring of love and sadness you have shared with us
since January 7th. It has been incredible, even though we haven't always been in the right
frame of mind to acknowledge it. Jennifer was so amazing that there are so many more
memories I have in my head, including the simple everyday ones that I will cherish forever.
I know she will continue to live in all our hearts forever and ever. Jen I love you and miss
you so much that the pain just won't go away. I hope someday the pain will lessen, but my
love will for you will always grow. I Love You Jen!!!!!!!!
Love and Luck from Gerry, Mom or Lil G
wonderful memories we shared. The first pages of my book would be filled with the love
we shared from the moment I laid eyes on her. On March 28th, 1975, I gave birth to the
most beautiful baby in the world. From that day on, I knew that Jennifer and I would begin
a relationship that I would cherish forever. She followed me around the house as if she
were part of my shadow, always looking up at me with those beautiful big brown eyes and
melting my heart. As Jennifer grew up we continued to grow closer and closer both as
mother and daughter as well as best friends. We could look into each other's eyes and
know what the other one was thinking.
I constantly observed a selfless caring person. She always expected perfection from
herself but never demanded it of others. She looked at me as her Hero and I saw her as
my Hero. Many times when we would switch roles and she would become the mother and I
the child, she would comfort me and try to reassure me that everything was going to be
fine. She always knew when I was upset about something. We could always confide in
each other and share our inner most thoughts. We had a respect for each other's
opinions, views and always considered each other's feelings. I always loved to see her get
excited about funny things. There were times when she would laugh so hard that she
would put her hand to her mouth and chuckle so heartily that her eyes would tear up.
Many pages of my book would be filled with the fun and laughter we shared. We would
shop all day, since anyone that knows Jen knows how much she loved to shop. She
taught me about style and fashion, how to do a French Manicure and straighten my hair.
We would watch TV together, and nobody was better at Friends Trivia than Jen, since
that was one of her favorite shows. We also loved trying to figure out the plot on our
favorite soap opera. Sometimes on Sunday afternoons you could catch Jen and I on the
couch watching a good movie.
Some of my pages would be splattered with sauce, since one of Jen's favorite things was
to cook Italian food. She became very confident in her cooking, and even taught me how
to make few dishes, such as enchiladas and stromboli. Jen had become a very
adventurous cook, always trying out new recipes that she had found. She also helped to
decorate our house by helping to pick out just the right furniture and pictures that would
go with our "Island/Nautical Theme" that helped to make our house so special.
Jen put passion into everything she did. She always had such an inner strength. She
never gave up and worked very hard to accomplish anything she set her mind to. When
she entered a room, she always had style and walked with such grace that she turned
heads and lit up the room. She always looked at life as a beautiful gift no matter what
trials she faced. She used to say to me "I choose my fights and battles and when it's just
not important you have to let it go."
You would find some of the pages filled with Yankee baseball memorabilia, since Jen was
an avid fan and loved to discuss and watch Yankees games with her Dad. At first she
would tell her Dad to stop screaming out loud at Yankee Stadium or at the TV, but then as
she became the True Blue Yankee Fan, she could scream and yell for her team as loud
as anyone else.
Some of my favorite pages would be filled with pictures of her many students at St. Ann's
Regional School in Wildwood. Jen loved teaching and I think she had a true gift. She
shared with me her philosophy on teaching one day. She said she believes each child is a
special child and she felt blessed and honored to be a part of it. She always taught with
the motto "To strive to make a difference in the students lives and to empower them to
live up to their potential that she knew each and every one of them possessed." She
shared with me her favorite phrase about teaching from Forrest Witcraft:
"One hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of
house I lived in or the kind of car I drove, but the world may be different because I was
important in the life of a child."
Jen use to say that someday she wanted to have children and shared with me in a card "I
hope someday when I have children I can teach them everything you taught me.
Then suddenly a mother's worst nightmare happened - on January 7th my Jennifer was
taken away from me. The next several pages would be filled with tears, confusion, anger
and frustration, as I try desperately to somehow accept that my baby Jennifer is gone.
Family and friends immediately came to surround us and support us. Our house was filled
with people, food, flowers and cards, and all I could do was sit and cry on the couch
during this horrible nightmare. Now weeks, even months have passed and I still sit and
talk with those same family and friends who shared words of wisdom and comforted me. I
look at the many beautiful cards we received, and walk around our house looking at the
many beautiful pictures of my Jennifer, and I still feel the pain and the loss of my beautiful
girl. Everyone tells me it will get easier with time... well, I'm still waiting for it to get easier.
Although this has been all about my beautiful Jennifer, I have been blessed with another
beautiful daughter, Michelle. She has been my strength through this and I am so grateful
that she is patient with me, and I look forward to the many memories we will continue to
share together.
Jennifer touched so many hearts and lives in her short time with us. We cannot thank
everyone enough for all the outpouring of love and sadness you have shared with us
since January 7th. It has been incredible, even though we haven't always been in the right
frame of mind to acknowledge it. Jennifer was so amazing that there are so many more
memories I have in my head, including the simple everyday ones that I will cherish forever.
I know she will continue to live in all our hearts forever and ever. Jen I love you and miss
you so much that the pain just won't go away. I hope someday the pain will lessen, but my
love will for you will always grow. I Love You Jen!!!!!!!!
Love and Luck from Gerry, Mom or Lil G
The first day that I met Jennifer was on Good Friday, back on March 28, 1975. The
morning started with my wife Gerry being about 8 and 1/2 months pregnant with our first
child. We were babies ourselves - my wife had just turned 22 on February 26th, and I was
all of 20 until June 3, when I finally became "all grown up" at 21 (yeah right!!). Lil' Gerry
started having some pains she thought were contractions in the morning, so we checked
into Barnett Hospital. Barnett was a Jewish Hospital, and since it was also the first day of
Passover, Gerry traded in her Italian cooking for Jewish food during her stay there. Her
water broke when they examined her, so they decided to keep her there even though the
real contractions had not started yet. They told me to go home around 5pm and eat
dinner, as the Jewish doctor went home for his Passover Dinner thinking Gerry would not
deliver until later in the night or the next morning. Well, I came back around 7 that night
and Jen had decided she had enough of this labor nonsense and the nurses went into a
sense of urgency mode.
They sent me into the waiting room around 7:30 to play Solitaire by myself - remember,
this was 1975 and some doctors didn't believe in the Dad being in the delivery room back
in the day. They called the doctor and he made it back just in time to help bring Jen into
this world at 8:02 pm. One of the nurses came in and told me we had a baby girl! I didn't
believe her, as I thought the doctor would tell me we had a baby boy, but he also informed
me that we had a baby girl, and that Mommy and baby were just fine. They finally let me
go see Jen in the nursery, thru that glass window you see on TV, and as I looked at her
for the first time, she had her little fists behind her head and sneezed. I thought, "How
could a baby sneeze already?" I loved her so much then that I forgot I had wanted a boy.
Some of the other fathers there who already had daughters said they wanted girls instead
of boys, because you get to hug them and kiss them so much more than you could with
boys - back in the day you couldn't be mushy with boys the way you could with girls. I went
to see Gerry and kissed her goodnight and told her what a great job she did, and that I
loved them both so much. I then went out and bought cigars and felt like I was walking on
clouds when I told everyone how proud I was to be Jen's Father!!!!!
Jen was always a great daughter and she always made us proud no matter what she did
during her short life - being a kid playing with pots and pans, graduating day care,
grammar school, Ocean City High School, and Loyola College. She was always beautiful,
not only when she dressed up for Graduations, Proms and Weddings, but especially when
she put on her Island attire and beach hats and gave us that wonderful smile that told us
she was so happy. She loved her Yankees, and would always cheer as loud as anyone
when we would watch games together - especially all those World Series championships!
One thing I can honestly say is Jen helped me grow up to be the man I am today. Helping
to raise her gave me the motivation to work hard and try to be the best Father I could be.
We kind of grew up together in the 70's and 80's.
Jen, in the early 90's, turned me on to this Parrothead thing and Jimmy Buffett and Island
Music. For anyone that knows me, I took to this lifestyle like a fish to water and have never
looked back at my old ways!!!! I became a bigger Parrothead then Jen was, and when I
told her that she introduced me to this music and lifestyle, she would raise her eyes to
heaven and tell Gerry, "Sorry for creating 'The Shark'!!!" Needless to say, we are one of
the few lucky families who raised their kids and were lucky enough to hang out and party
with them after they grew up. We were accepted by Jen and her friends as being cool
enough parents to hang out with. We will always treasure those extra moments that she
allowed us to have with her, whether at the Beach, Beach Bars, Waterfront Restaurants,
Key West, and all the concerts, tailgates, and shows we shared - Parrotville (aka
Parrotbeach), Jim Morris and the Big Bamboo Band, Sunny Jim, Scott Kirby and of course
Jimmy Buffett. Jen, I loved you and respected you as much as any good, caring Father
could. I know you loved me and respected me as much as any good, caring Daughter
could. I wish we could have finished the job we started, and helped you to continue your
journey on earth, to know the joys of marriage, motherhood, homeownership and all the
beautiful experiences of raising your own children, like we have had raising you and
Michelle. You will always be in our hearts and thoughts as we miss you so much that
thinking of you helps me get through the day. I Love You Jen!!!!!!!!!!!
Love and Luck
Jerry, Dad, Shark or Uncle Sharkie!!!!
morning started with my wife Gerry being about 8 and 1/2 months pregnant with our first
child. We were babies ourselves - my wife had just turned 22 on February 26th, and I was
all of 20 until June 3, when I finally became "all grown up" at 21 (yeah right!!). Lil' Gerry
started having some pains she thought were contractions in the morning, so we checked
into Barnett Hospital. Barnett was a Jewish Hospital, and since it was also the first day of
Passover, Gerry traded in her Italian cooking for Jewish food during her stay there. Her
water broke when they examined her, so they decided to keep her there even though the
real contractions had not started yet. They told me to go home around 5pm and eat
dinner, as the Jewish doctor went home for his Passover Dinner thinking Gerry would not
deliver until later in the night or the next morning. Well, I came back around 7 that night
and Jen had decided she had enough of this labor nonsense and the nurses went into a
sense of urgency mode.
They sent me into the waiting room around 7:30 to play Solitaire by myself - remember,
this was 1975 and some doctors didn't believe in the Dad being in the delivery room back
in the day. They called the doctor and he made it back just in time to help bring Jen into
this world at 8:02 pm. One of the nurses came in and told me we had a baby girl! I didn't
believe her, as I thought the doctor would tell me we had a baby boy, but he also informed
me that we had a baby girl, and that Mommy and baby were just fine. They finally let me
go see Jen in the nursery, thru that glass window you see on TV, and as I looked at her
for the first time, she had her little fists behind her head and sneezed. I thought, "How
could a baby sneeze already?" I loved her so much then that I forgot I had wanted a boy.
Some of the other fathers there who already had daughters said they wanted girls instead
of boys, because you get to hug them and kiss them so much more than you could with
boys - back in the day you couldn't be mushy with boys the way you could with girls. I went
to see Gerry and kissed her goodnight and told her what a great job she did, and that I
loved them both so much. I then went out and bought cigars and felt like I was walking on
clouds when I told everyone how proud I was to be Jen's Father!!!!!
Jen was always a great daughter and she always made us proud no matter what she did
during her short life - being a kid playing with pots and pans, graduating day care,
grammar school, Ocean City High School, and Loyola College. She was always beautiful,
not only when she dressed up for Graduations, Proms and Weddings, but especially when
she put on her Island attire and beach hats and gave us that wonderful smile that told us
she was so happy. She loved her Yankees, and would always cheer as loud as anyone
when we would watch games together - especially all those World Series championships!
One thing I can honestly say is Jen helped me grow up to be the man I am today. Helping
to raise her gave me the motivation to work hard and try to be the best Father I could be.
We kind of grew up together in the 70's and 80's.
Jen, in the early 90's, turned me on to this Parrothead thing and Jimmy Buffett and Island
Music. For anyone that knows me, I took to this lifestyle like a fish to water and have never
looked back at my old ways!!!! I became a bigger Parrothead then Jen was, and when I
told her that she introduced me to this music and lifestyle, she would raise her eyes to
heaven and tell Gerry, "Sorry for creating 'The Shark'!!!" Needless to say, we are one of
the few lucky families who raised their kids and were lucky enough to hang out and party
with them after they grew up. We were accepted by Jen and her friends as being cool
enough parents to hang out with. We will always treasure those extra moments that she
allowed us to have with her, whether at the Beach, Beach Bars, Waterfront Restaurants,
Key West, and all the concerts, tailgates, and shows we shared - Parrotville (aka
Parrotbeach), Jim Morris and the Big Bamboo Band, Sunny Jim, Scott Kirby and of course
Jimmy Buffett. Jen, I loved you and respected you as much as any good, caring Father
could. I know you loved me and respected me as much as any good, caring Daughter
could. I wish we could have finished the job we started, and helped you to continue your
journey on earth, to know the joys of marriage, motherhood, homeownership and all the
beautiful experiences of raising your own children, like we have had raising you and
Michelle. You will always be in our hearts and thoughts as we miss you so much that
thinking of you helps me get through the day. I Love You Jen!!!!!!!!!!!
Love and Luck
Jerry, Dad, Shark or Uncle Sharkie!!!!
| Jen and Jerry |
I am not sure that I know how to write this letter about Jen, but I will try. I have learned a
vast amount of so many different things in my life thus far, but the one thing that I had
feared my whole life and did not aspire to learn is how to mourn the loss of a loved one -
more specifically, my sister Jen. Let me rephrase that, because the word "sister" does not
do our relationship justice. Jen was not only my big sister, she was my role model, my best
friend, the person I could rely on for ANYTHING, my confidant, my hero… that is just the
beginning of a list that could go on and on. How do I put into words my feelings about my
big sister, who was so quickly and unexpectedly taken from us, gone without us even
having the opportunity to say good-bye? Well, I will give it my best try.
If I know one thing for sure, it is that I will NEVER be able to forget the night of January 7,
2005. My parents will tell you that I have always been called a "worry wart". If anyone I
cared about (usually my parents, when they would leave me home with Jen) were even a
minute late, I would start to go into panic mode. This is because losing someone I love and
facing the possibility of never seeing them again has ALWAYS been one of my biggest
fears. I did not know if I would be strong enough to handle that kind of loss. I have had so
many good things happen to me in life, but also have suffered what I formerly thought of
as "losses" - the loss of a boyfriend or relationship, the loss of a friendship, the loss of a
pet. I knew because of what I have gone through in life that I am a pretty strong girl, but I
wasn't sure that I would be strong enough to handle losing my only big sister.
Well, it has been six months since that dreadful night, and I have proven to myself that I
am unwillingly strong enough. I say "unwillingly" because this is a situation that I almost do
not want to be strong enough for, but I am because I know I have to be. I have plenty of
people in my life who want me to be strong and who care for me. Most of all, I definitely
know Jen would want me to be strong. Jen wasn't able to experience the miracle of
motherhood that both longed to encounter, and that is truly devastating. If there is one
thing that will have to suffice as far as Jen being a "mother", it was the way she has always
mothered me. Not only was she my best friend, but also she was always my second
mother. She always looked out for me and put me first - this is why I know that she wants
me to be strong.
Unfortunately, I was forced into realizing my biggest fear through this whole experience of
mourning my sister. I have definitely learned that life does keep moving, and we are here
to keep Jen's spirit alive and to keep her living through us. Although we never expected to
deal with a loss like this for the rest of our lives, I know we have to keep living, for Jen and
for ourselves. There is not a day that goes by that I do not think about Jen. Thinking of
her still brings an element of sadness to me and, sometimes, tears to my eyes, but I know
that as time goes on I will rely on these thoughts to get me through difficult experiences.
One day, these thoughts will mostly induce a smile on my face, and I look forward to that.
To quote a fellow teacher, it isn't a matter of how you are when something this tragic
happens; it is a matter of how you manage the whole experience on a daily basis that is
important. You do not ever "get over" something like this - it is not humanly possible - you
just learn new ways to deal with the feelings as each new day begins.
Jen - I love you so much and miss you more than any words or letter can or will ever be
able to express. I know you are watching down on all of us, making our paths through life a
little smoother, because we now have you as our own Guardian Angel.
Love, Michelle
vast amount of so many different things in my life thus far, but the one thing that I had
feared my whole life and did not aspire to learn is how to mourn the loss of a loved one -
more specifically, my sister Jen. Let me rephrase that, because the word "sister" does not
do our relationship justice. Jen was not only my big sister, she was my role model, my best
friend, the person I could rely on for ANYTHING, my confidant, my hero… that is just the
beginning of a list that could go on and on. How do I put into words my feelings about my
big sister, who was so quickly and unexpectedly taken from us, gone without us even
having the opportunity to say good-bye? Well, I will give it my best try.
If I know one thing for sure, it is that I will NEVER be able to forget the night of January 7,
2005. My parents will tell you that I have always been called a "worry wart". If anyone I
cared about (usually my parents, when they would leave me home with Jen) were even a
minute late, I would start to go into panic mode. This is because losing someone I love and
facing the possibility of never seeing them again has ALWAYS been one of my biggest
fears. I did not know if I would be strong enough to handle that kind of loss. I have had so
many good things happen to me in life, but also have suffered what I formerly thought of
as "losses" - the loss of a boyfriend or relationship, the loss of a friendship, the loss of a
pet. I knew because of what I have gone through in life that I am a pretty strong girl, but I
wasn't sure that I would be strong enough to handle losing my only big sister.
Well, it has been six months since that dreadful night, and I have proven to myself that I
am unwillingly strong enough. I say "unwillingly" because this is a situation that I almost do
not want to be strong enough for, but I am because I know I have to be. I have plenty of
people in my life who want me to be strong and who care for me. Most of all, I definitely
know Jen would want me to be strong. Jen wasn't able to experience the miracle of
motherhood that both longed to encounter, and that is truly devastating. If there is one
thing that will have to suffice as far as Jen being a "mother", it was the way she has always
mothered me. Not only was she my best friend, but also she was always my second
mother. She always looked out for me and put me first - this is why I know that she wants
me to be strong.
Unfortunately, I was forced into realizing my biggest fear through this whole experience of
mourning my sister. I have definitely learned that life does keep moving, and we are here
to keep Jen's spirit alive and to keep her living through us. Although we never expected to
deal with a loss like this for the rest of our lives, I know we have to keep living, for Jen and
for ourselves. There is not a day that goes by that I do not think about Jen. Thinking of
her still brings an element of sadness to me and, sometimes, tears to my eyes, but I know
that as time goes on I will rely on these thoughts to get me through difficult experiences.
One day, these thoughts will mostly induce a smile on my face, and I look forward to that.
To quote a fellow teacher, it isn't a matter of how you are when something this tragic
happens; it is a matter of how you manage the whole experience on a daily basis that is
important. You do not ever "get over" something like this - it is not humanly possible - you
just learn new ways to deal with the feelings as each new day begins.
Jen - I love you so much and miss you more than any words or letter can or will ever be
able to express. I know you are watching down on all of us, making our paths through life a
little smoother, because we now have you as our own Guardian Angel.
Love, Michelle
Jen and Michelle
Jen and I met in the summer of 2001 at a Parrotville show on the 4th of July weekend.
However, it wasn't until - surprise - another Parrotville show, a week into 2003, that Jen
became more than "just another stinkin' Yankees fan". Trying to convince her to join the
rest of us Parrotheads out on the dance floor that night, and no doubt given a boost from
some liquid courage, I asked Jen why she was "so unapproachable". Little did I know that
Jen's New Year's resolution was to be more outgoing, so when she wanted to know what
that meant, I had to convince her I was just being observant. Luckily, I remembered this
"unapproachable chick" always danced to "Brown Eyed Girl" with Gerry and "One
Particular Harbour" with Michelle. So with a little help from Jimmy Buffett and Van Morrison
(and Gary and the rest of Parrotville), I was able to get myself off the hook AND get Jen
out dancing for the rest of the night. Thus, with a clumsy and unintentional line, began two
wonderful years of "dimple-ing" my way out of trouble and into her heart.
Jen was such an amazing person that nothing I could say here could possibly do the
person she was justice. She showed me how someone could be completely selfless and
be so happy thinking of everyone else before herself. From her, I saw that happiness
doesn't necessarily come from what trip is next, but who is holding your hand during the
journey. She kept up with my occasionally frantic-paced life, and even though it wasn't
always her thing, she enjoyed (almost) every minute of it, as long as we were together.
Jen and I had a way of complimenting each other that made almost every moment and
every memory a good one. She brought out the absolute best in me, even when I was
"being T.J." as she put it, and it made me love her that much more. There were so many
wonderful nights sitting around the tiki bar, or heading off somewhere for the weekend, or
out having fun, or even just spending time with our families. Jen, you will always be with
us, for each of the holidays and weddings and concerts and tiki bar nights and quiet
family and friends nights. On these occasions and many more, you will be in our thoughts
and in our toasts. I still hear you laughing with us, I can still see your smile glowing, and
even can feel your tears when you cry along with us. No matter what, you will always be
with me and the people who love you, for all of life's ups and its occasional downs -
hopefully we'll be celebrating a lot more ups, and you will be there in spirit for every single
one. Wherever you are, we know for you it's now ALWAYS 5 o'clock somewhere...
I hope I made her as happy as she seemed in all the pictures, as she deserved the joy
that she brought into the lives of her family and her friends, and of course, into my life. I
still smile thinking of all the little things that made the "big things" so much better - holding
hands and dancing, the hug when first seeing each other after several days or weeks, the
little "HEY!!" or "TeeJaaay!" whenever a little playful teasing found its mark, the look of
hope in her eye during disagreements when she realized I would never give up on us, the
smile on her face after being on the receiving end of a "Just because I love you" surprise
kiss. For however long I remain here, these things will remind me that there are things in
life that are worth the wait and worth the sacrifice one must undergo to find them. For
giving me that feeling, Jen, I thank you, and cherish how special you made me in your life.
Two years were much, much too short when you find something that is just so very
special, so very right. But some people go their whole lives looking for what Jen and I had,
so those two years will remain with me for the rest of my life. I love you sweetheart, you
are in my heart forever.
Love and Luck always,
T.J.
However, it wasn't until - surprise - another Parrotville show, a week into 2003, that Jen
became more than "just another stinkin' Yankees fan". Trying to convince her to join the
rest of us Parrotheads out on the dance floor that night, and no doubt given a boost from
some liquid courage, I asked Jen why she was "so unapproachable". Little did I know that
Jen's New Year's resolution was to be more outgoing, so when she wanted to know what
that meant, I had to convince her I was just being observant. Luckily, I remembered this
"unapproachable chick" always danced to "Brown Eyed Girl" with Gerry and "One
Particular Harbour" with Michelle. So with a little help from Jimmy Buffett and Van Morrison
(and Gary and the rest of Parrotville), I was able to get myself off the hook AND get Jen
out dancing for the rest of the night. Thus, with a clumsy and unintentional line, began two
wonderful years of "dimple-ing" my way out of trouble and into her heart.
Jen was such an amazing person that nothing I could say here could possibly do the
person she was justice. She showed me how someone could be completely selfless and
be so happy thinking of everyone else before herself. From her, I saw that happiness
doesn't necessarily come from what trip is next, but who is holding your hand during the
journey. She kept up with my occasionally frantic-paced life, and even though it wasn't
always her thing, she enjoyed (almost) every minute of it, as long as we were together.
Jen and I had a way of complimenting each other that made almost every moment and
every memory a good one. She brought out the absolute best in me, even when I was
"being T.J." as she put it, and it made me love her that much more. There were so many
wonderful nights sitting around the tiki bar, or heading off somewhere for the weekend, or
out having fun, or even just spending time with our families. Jen, you will always be with
us, for each of the holidays and weddings and concerts and tiki bar nights and quiet
family and friends nights. On these occasions and many more, you will be in our thoughts
and in our toasts. I still hear you laughing with us, I can still see your smile glowing, and
even can feel your tears when you cry along with us. No matter what, you will always be
with me and the people who love you, for all of life's ups and its occasional downs -
hopefully we'll be celebrating a lot more ups, and you will be there in spirit for every single
one. Wherever you are, we know for you it's now ALWAYS 5 o'clock somewhere...
I hope I made her as happy as she seemed in all the pictures, as she deserved the joy
that she brought into the lives of her family and her friends, and of course, into my life. I
still smile thinking of all the little things that made the "big things" so much better - holding
hands and dancing, the hug when first seeing each other after several days or weeks, the
little "HEY!!" or "TeeJaaay!" whenever a little playful teasing found its mark, the look of
hope in her eye during disagreements when she realized I would never give up on us, the
smile on her face after being on the receiving end of a "Just because I love you" surprise
kiss. For however long I remain here, these things will remind me that there are things in
life that are worth the wait and worth the sacrifice one must undergo to find them. For
giving me that feeling, Jen, I thank you, and cherish how special you made me in your life.
Two years were much, much too short when you find something that is just so very
special, so very right. But some people go their whole lives looking for what Jen and I had,
so those two years will remain with me for the rest of my life. I love you sweetheart, you
are in my heart forever.
Love and Luck always,
T.J.
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Jen and T.J.
The Jennifer Ward Memorial Fund